I’ve really been stressing a lot about this trip.
Originally, it was just for me, then it turned into a way to get closer to God. Then things just kind of expanded. I had some issues with finding somebody to watch my dog and one thing led to another, so for a long time, I never really got it going.
Now that I’m almost abound to hit Boundary Waters, I worry that things are not going to go quite as I expected them to go, not in terms of the actual canoeing but in terms of how I feel about being alone for an extended period of time.
Being a people person, I try to be around people as much as possible. Not only does it help me, but it also bring something to the other people… or maybe they wouldn’t want to be around me in the first place.
A lot of my concerns are just the loneliness. What if God doesn’t speak to me? What if I don’t have the transformation I think I’m going to have?
Those are some of the things that go through my mind. It’s highly stressing. As well as the drive those thoughts are making sure my canoe is in shape and all of my gear packed. Which, by the way, my pack is way upwards of 65 or 70 pounds, so I’m hoping there’s not a lot of portaging going on.
Be that as it may, I’m probably going to go through my bag one more time and really eliminate pretty much everything except for food tent and sleeping bag or one change of clothes. I don’t know that I’ll need much else besides that anyway.
My apologies for not having this blog updated before now. I really don’t have a reason outside of trying to hide some of my fears from the inside. I had so many expectations of myself for this trip that, once they didn’t come together as I wanted them to, I was a little bit on the embarrassed side.
I prayed a lot about this and decided this trip was really more about me and getting away from the everyday cares of the world and drawing closer to God in the world Ernest then it was about anything else anyways.
I really hope I do meet some people when I’m out canoeing that I can share God’s word with, but if I don’t then just “me and God time” is going to be good enough.
I’m not sure how well my cell phone reception is going to be in Boundary Waters and I didn’t have the money to activate my spot, so my apologies on that aspect.
I am truly going it alone.
Any emergencies small injuries like finger burned in the fire or hypothermia… anything that could happen and go wrong, I will truly be on my own.
This should be a good test my outdoor skills, and my resolve, to follow and accomplish a goal that I have wanted to accomplish. My next update will be picture heavy so I hope everyone stays tuned.
One more quick shout-out the Northstar canoes I’ve had the opportunity paddle. I’ve had it out a couple times, and this Northwind solo is an amazing canoe that handles and tracks unlike anything I’ve ever been in before, and it’s super fast. I hope that my skills are able to really put this to the test, but I feel this canoe is well beyond my abilities.
Please feel free to leave any comments you have in my section and, as always, thank you for reading. God bless until my next entry.